Musings of a Toronto Therapist:

A Common Thread: Recently, someone asked my if I notice any recurring themes in my therapeutic work with clients. This was a tough question because I have worked with clients facing so many unique and complex challenges -- and I do my best to see each person I work with as coming from their own distinct vantage point. One theme, though, that stood out for me was that of self-criticism. I'll describe this self-criticism as an ongoing and somewhat relentless thought stream of scrutiny and judgment that is self-directed. Many of us are initially hesitant to explore or possibly question their 'inner-critic' -- "Isn't that the voice that keeps me striving? How am I going to improve or excel if that critic isn't sparking me into action?"

Ironically, what often becomes clear is that inner-criticism seems to be at the heart of esteem problems, depression, anxiety and general unhappiness -- all of which make it that much more difficult to pursue the fulfilling lives we all want. Therapy can be an opportunity to develop a kinder and more supportive relationship with ourselves….a chance to explore where we learned our specific tendencies toward self-criticism and what might be holding us back from befriending ourselves with the generosity we tend to show those people who are important to us.